


lovesick

by legalityQueen



Series: legend of zelda oneshots [6]
Category: The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Angst, F/M, Internal Monologue, Lovesickness, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-16 00:23:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16943496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legalityQueen/pseuds/legalityQueen





	lovesick

The first thing I noticed was the light. The second thing I noticed was the cold. The third thing I noticed was my lungs screaming for air. I didn’t know where I was, or why the room was blue, or why water was draining from below me. I didn’t know who I was. Naturally, a part of my mind pushed me out of the temporary tomb. Each muscle ached, screaming of a thousand battles before. 

I remember making my way out of the shrine. Only, then, I hadn’t known it was a shrine. More, and more light, pierced my eyes. Luckily, it was warmer outside. On my way, I had found clothes as well, and some strange technology. I began to grow accustomed to moving. On old man that I met — who turned out to be your father in disguise — explained some of my journey to me. I began to understand small pieces of my identity. 

My name is Link.

I am a hero.

My goal is to defeat Calamity Ganon.

And though the physical aspects of my journey are tiring, they aren’t what keep me up at night. While I lay, staring at the night sky, my thoughts cannot seem to relax. By now, sleep would be paradise. I fight all day, running, and swinging blades, and dodging from deadly foes, and climbing up mountains. Similarly to when I first woke up, my muscles scream every time I move. My lungs ache from overexertion instead of underuse. But here I am, thinking of you.

Through the memories I’ve been collecting, my identity’s fog has cleared. Not only am I Link, a hero, with the goal to defeat Calamity Ganon; I’m Link, the personal guard of the Princess, Zelda. The one chosen to wield the Sacred Blade. The one who fell in battle 100 years ago. The one who lived, somehow.

I see you. Underneath your blonde hair and cold demeanor is you. Someone who I don’t think shows herself to others much. Someone locked in an internal battle. You’ve often played off moments as nothing more than nonsense: you didn’t mean those words, as they were fallacies. You don’t think when you speak. Or so you say. 

Perhaps, at times, everything becomes too much for you and you do slip away. But, perhaps, you choose to seem like you don’t care, so you cannot be judged. For your whole life, you have been judged. Your parents have raised you to believe that, without this sacred power, you’re useless. Without commanding the light, your efforts are wasted. You’ve been told to pray more, to devote yourself more, to work harder. You’ve been called a failure. And you saw me, of all people, as validation to your uselessness.

Yet, this is the very last thing I’d want you to feel. I think, so often, of how I look up to you. You, who was strong enough to continue to fight. Who was brave enough to not give up. Who was intelligent enough to lead us all. Who was resilient enough to keep going, even when your parents told you you weren’t good enough. Who knew how to save me.

The problem, with this lovesickness, is I’ll never be able to voice it. I’ll never be able to tell you how I feel. And a part of me tells me that this feeling… _isn’t new._

I haven’t spoken to anyone in such a long time. However, I wasn’t always mute. I used to speak. Looking back on my newly recovered memories, I rarely spoke to you either. One day, you asked me why I didn’t talk. I had told you it was because I was intimidated by the pressure of being a hero. I didn’t want everyone to recount what I said.

In reality, I don’t speak because I don’t want to let you down. I don’t want to open my mouth and hear my feelings towards you spill out all at once. They’d be unidentifiable, and confusing, and would probably bewilder you. So, I decided to keep my mouth shut. And before long, this was my resort for whenever I was around people. I didn’t want you to blame yourself for my lack of speech, so I decided not to speak around anyone. Not to speak anymore. So I didn’t. 

Some of my most pained times to look back on are those when you did push me away. When you didn’t want me by your side. I know that you’re (by far) strong enough without me. Yet, for some reason, I could never shake the feeling of needing to protect you. You’re the one who stands up straighter than I do, who’s been through more than I have, and yet I act like I’m entitled to protect you. The more you opened up to me, the more I couldn’t stay away. The more precious you became. The more that I knew I needed you.

Symbols of you appeared wherever I looked. Whether they were wildlife, spots we visited, or your favorite color; I saw them everywhere. I thought of you everywhere. Every night, just like tonight, I stare up at the stars and cannot get you out of my head. I curse myself for taking longer to save you. The less I sleep, the worse I’ll move tomorrow; the slower I move later, the longer I’ll take to reach the castle. For a hundred years, you’ve been doing the work that I should’ve done right the first time. I shouldn’t have let you down. I cannot let you down again. 

And even if you never discover the way I feel, I will not fail once more. Rolling over in bed, I see the petal of a Silent Princess which crumpled out of my bag. It was slick- probably from food, or some other liquid which it could’ve accidentally encountered. I close my eyes, and your face is on the back of my eyelids. 

Even if I never surpass this lovesickness, I will save you.


End file.
